How to change a life

I have become a little frustrated by the lingering pandemic habit of laying on my couch to get through the day. It has transformed into a television watching issue. It is eating my life. Going to have to get back to the things I love about life, which all relate to making things. Gotta get myself stimulated in creative ways.

Today the thought revolves around the idea that I like making things for other people. The current thought is back to making videos and content around what I am curious about. To a degree, it is about an audience. But harnessing their responses to move me forward. Unfortunately, this is a bit dangerous for me. Creating things for outside approval has some issues. The main thing is uploading content and watching it, desperate for a positive response. This can get a little unhealthy for me. Really need to sit with it and figure out how to deal with it positively.

What am I actually thinking? Well, it has to do with Mr. Beast and the idea of really making engaging content. He employs several strategies that make his content enjoyable, engaging, and stimulating. A mix of curiosity baiting and expectation fulfillment – mixed with storytelling.

Can someone live a life like this? I appreciate the joy and fascination side of living like this. The idea of always talking like JoJo Siwa terrifies me. I mean, those buddhist monks that seem tickled by every idea and every experience they have … that seems pretty nice. I mean, I don’t quite want to falsify those reactions. I want to welcome them in and place myself in a state to receive joy and appreciation. I see plenty of people who have primed themselves to accept disappointment and dissatisfaction.

Maybe what I am really after is permission to be the hero of my own story. The protagonist of what I want out of life. A process of recognizing and digesting my experiences. Processing what my life is …? That could be a bit dangerous. That means selecting parts of my life over others. Cutting out the down time. Focusing on the accomplishments and not the work involved in reaching those goals. All sticky stuff to deal with. Though worthwhile things to learn.